Updated: Jan 14, 2021
You are a good, good Father.
That is Your identity.
Well, I am loved.
My lungs are filled by You. By Your breath. By the life You emanate.
That breath spreads through me.
I hear the whisper in my soul.
It grows loud.
In and out my lungs push that Life through my being.
Then a gasp! And a sigh.
What is this I feel? Nothing?
No, this is something.
But it is not pain. It is not fear.
What is this?
Peace. Not in the midst of chaos.
Is there chaos? No. I look around, but it’s not there.
Does chaos exist? I cannot remember what it looks like.
The memory of it fades. Just Peace.
Is that the word? Perhaps.
It does not matter. What are words at a time like this? Can I put into words what I feel? Could it ever explain?
Freedom. Contentment. Confidence. Boldness. Certainty.
That feeling you have when you are so comfortable in someone else’s house that you can walk into the kitchen, open up the refrigerator and help yourself to whatever is inside.
That is what this is.
Whose house am I in?
The gentleness in the voice brought a subtle rush to my heart. With eyes closed, a smile graced my face, I waited for the coming words.
What is it you desire?
I turned my countenance toward the One who called my name.
“Abba, I want what you want for me.”
My hand reached up to touch His face. The rugged beard that met my fingers filled my soul with a sense of safety.
“You adopted me.” I looked around, gesturing to the beauty around me.
“All this, all of this house, this Home, this is mine.”
I could see the twinkle in His eye.
“You bought me.” My head bowed. I felt the import of my own statement.
“How could I ask beyond Your heart and will? I could not bring myself to this position.”
As I raised my gaze to His, I basked in the smile of pride that poured His approval over me.
“You sealed me with Holy Spirit. I cannot pretend I serve my own will.”
With a gasp I realized what I had said. I saw the picture He had painted.
“Every part of You chose me. As One You knew You wanted me. Everyone else dumped me.
But You. You who thought of me first. You who took such care in shaping my cells and the makeup of my DNA.
You who came! You came down, below your position, or so many would think. And what did You do?
You said I was good. You validated my existence.
Abba, You fulfilled Your Fatherhood.
Jesus, Brother, Savior, You came and paid the cost.
Holy Spirit, You have always shown the world my identity. You have always shown to Whom I belong.
And together, You gave me more than I could ever ask.
I am loved.
So how could I want any other than what You want?”
My heart poured out, I am sure and steady.
I am confident that I will never want, for who could cut off the hand of my Father?
I am Satisfied.
This post is brought to you by the Weekly Song!
This week’s song is Atmosphere by Luminate
This song has been a consistent soundtrack as I dream my way through life and discovering God.